The email inquiry

March 8, 2010

Really, this is a very easy thing to do.  Yet there are so many complaints from ladies about hobbyists who just don’t fracking get it that I thought it ought to be first in the Hobbyist Primer.

Put in your name.  First name is often fine.

Add your board handle.  If you don’t have a handle, say so.   

Include your references.  Let me state for the record that there is nothing so important in the first email as making sure to provide references.  If you can’t be bothered to include your references, there are any number of ladies who feel perfectly justified in deleting your email and not giving you another thought.  References.  References.  I say again, references.  The ladies’ names/handles and  contact info are the bare minimum. 

Some ladies have additional requirements.  I assure you, if she is any sort of quality, these additional requirements will be easy to find.  Right in front of your face, even.  Try her ad, website or board signature.

Helpful Tips

When it comes to information, the more, the merrier.  Tell her what you like in particular when you see a new lady.  Give an idea of when and on what day you would like to see her, and give a range if possible just to help coordinate schedules all the faster.  Let her know if there are any restrictions on contacting you; if texts are a bad idea, if calls should only come during business hours.  Tell her if this is to be outcall or incall.  Let her know what sort of time you’d like to spend with her.

The same applies for your references.  It is tremendously helpful to include any information you can about your reference.  Approximately when you saw her last, how often you’ve seen her, does she know you by your first name or your board handle or by some other nickname entirely, any funny jokes you shared with your reference (if it’s been a while, this will help jog the lady’s memory).

If you really like, let her know what attracted you to her.  Did you like her posts and decided to look her up based on that?  Was her most recent ad eye-catching in some way?  A new picture that was just so stellar you had to find out if the steak was as good as the sizzle?  Did a hobby friend recommend her?  These things are not necessary, of course, but they’ll earn you cookie points with any number of providers.  We love this sort of feedback, and it helps our marketing.

Mamasan’s Pet Peeves

Don’t tell us how handsome you are.  We’re very happy for you but it just isn’t relevent.

Do not email ladies who state they are not newbie-friendly “just in case”.  She does not make exceptions.  No, not even for handsome guys.  Nor for guys who devoutly swear they are really, really nice and will meet her for a drink so she can see for herself how really, really nice they are.

Don’t ever describe yourself as a “good Christian family man”.  Seriously?  Bitch, please.

Don’t ask questions about rates or menu.  Don’t ever correlate the two.  Most quality ladies will not answer them.  Have a care, gents.

Don’t ever try to negotiate.  Ever.  This is not eBay.  I will DNS for this alone.


Well, this was thin

March 8, 2010

The relevent post.

The least he could have done was make a better effort of covering his duplicity.  Mamasan is not a fan of, “There I was, just minding my own business, innocent as hell and then BAM, out of NO WHERE she goes all psycho.”  Sure.  That’s the most likely scenario.  Right-o.

Reading between the lines, here’s Mamasan Snark’s The Rest of the Story (she is no Paul Harvey, but a lady can dream):

This young guy shows up, puts down money and starts asking a lot of questions while looking all around.  Say it with me, ladies:  Hello, vice cop.  The lady asks him a question – perhaps, “Why do you need to know?” or “I do not discuss menu activities.”  He reacts to her “attitude problem” by smarting off, she scoops up the money and tells him to leave right now or she’s calling her back-up.

And yet he gets to write an alert on her, whereas, on Eccie, if a reliable provider is beaten and robbed she has to keep it out of the public eye to “protect his security”.

I’m not entirely certain why any escort would want the typical Eccie hobbyist as a client.   This is pure speculation but, I suspect if there were another viable board option for advertising Eccie would be pure sausage fest.

ETA:  Chevalier brought this blog post back to my attention.  In retrospect, belay my last due to very sloppy phrasing.  The typical Eccie client is, in my experience, neither better nor worse than clients from any other site.  The typical Eccie male poster, on the other hand, is liable to be a complete tool.  Or at least to behave that way in public for benefit of other typical Eccie male posters.